♥ 2 ♥ ~ Is it Enough?

I have to share with you that this post has been sitting around unfinished for a few months now.  The timing never seemed right to finish it until I read Sue’s post on contentment and covetousness.

I did something at work this summer that I had never done before. I didn’t know at the time why I had done it. My income is dependent on gratuities.  I believe what I receive or don’t receive is the Lord’s provision. But I seemed to forget that in a split second when I returned change to a customer after he had told me that his check was “all set”. Let’s just say that his gratuity didn’t come close to meeting industry standards and the service he received wasn’t poor.  When he reiterated that it was all set, I left it on the table anyway. I had never done that before.   In my eyes, his gratuity was inadequate.  And my actions surely conveyed that.

I returned to my work station feeling sick in the pit of my stomach. Such a heaviness overcame me after I put that money back on the table. I had no peace. All I had was a nagging feeling; that feeling that comes from doing something that I shouldn’t have. We call that feeling guilt. I also call it the conviction of the Holy Spirit. I hate that feeling as I’m sure you do.

As I cried out to the Lord about this angst I was carrying around, He clearly showed me why I was carrying it.  He is my Provider and I had just shunned His provision.  I had clearly forgotten that He is the Sovereign Lord who determines all things. Besides that, I had acted less than graciously.

In that moment of recognizing my sin against the Lord, I was broken and repented. Instantly, the heaviness and angst were gone. As quickly as they had arrived, they departed. The freedom I felt was incredibly amazing. The Lord did more than just show me that night that I had shunned His provision. He provided something I needed much more than income.  “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9) Oh, how I needed that forgiveness and cleansing to restore my relationship with Him. How we all do…. Have you ever received His forgiveness for your sin and His gift of eternal life?  Have you felt the freedom that His forgiveness brings?  If you’re not sure, here’s something for you to read.

It’s time now to finish this post that has been incomplete for weeks. After reading Sue’s post, I realized that in a split second I allowed covetousness to rule in my heart and that’s why I did what I did.  I wanted more.  I wasn’t content with the Lord’s provision. What about you?  Are you content with what He has given you?  Is it enough?

Linking up with:

New Life Steward

Getting Down with Jesus

Women Living Well

Simply Helping Him

9 thoughts on “♥ 2 ♥ ~ Is it Enough?

  1. It’s hard sometimes to learn lessons from God… it cuts like a knife when we realise we have grieved Him… but He is so merciful when we return in repentance to Him as you have found. We are sinners saved by grace – on our way to perfection but not quite there yet – however, this is a great victory the Lord has given you on the journey and as such is just wonderful.

    • Wendy, I am so thankful for His conviction that leads us to be more like Christ – gracious and merciful in this circumstance would have been far better than my fleshly action. Thanks for reading and commenting today. I’m looking forward to reading at E1A soon!

  2. I started my married life as a restaurant server, and I wasn’t a Christian. Many times my heart was filled with angst (as you put it) when people were stingy or left nothing (we called this “getting stiffed” when I was a waitress). It is so wonderful to hear someone deal with this problem as a Christian. God bless you. Gail (Bible Love Notes)

    • Gail, we still call it “getting stiffed”! I am always quick to give thanks to the Lord when the gratuity is generous and now I’m learning to be content and to “give thanks in everything”! Thanks for stopping by T2 Women and I’ll be by to visit Bible Love Notes.

  3. Wow! This brought tears to my eyes. I just became a stay-at-home mom, but I covet the ability of other moms to do things. Unless I use a coupon for a deep discount, my home is job. I can only do whatever comes to me within these four walls. Thank you for reminding me that He is our provider and I need to be content with his provision, because He will always provide.

    • Thanks so much for sharing your heart with us. God bless you as you stay at home with your children. That is so wonderful! He will surely provide all you need. I’m reminded of Psalm 73:25 where the psalmist says that there is nothing he desires on earth but God. Content with Him…. He’s all we need!

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